For What its Worth

My ex-boyfriend (for whom I am very much a persona non grata) left with me with little baggage. He didn’t wound me or break my heart, he didn’t spoil me rotten, he just was. Because of this I barley think of him unless something reminds me of him in particular; a photograph, a song, a locale… One thing I do wish I could thank him for though was the gift of Neko Case. He turned me on to her and she remains one of my consistently played favourites. I’m now listening to the ‘hidden track’ on Middle Cyclone called Marais la Nuit. It’s 30 minutes of sounds recorded outside Neko’s country house, all crickets and night bugs and echoes. It’s beautiful and calming and I love it. It’s also what was playing when he kissed me for the first time. It’s moments like now that I wish we were still friends, I’d love to call him and check in- just say hey. Alas, when it come to me his ego is bigger than his heart, and maybe I deserve that, what do I know?
Anyway, thank you JSZ. Shabbat shalom.

The Decemberists

I FINALLY got to see them live tonight, and while they didn’t play me favourite song (My Mother Was a Chinese Trapeze Artist), they did put on a pretty great show.

Sisters

It’s no secret that I think my sister is the raddest. Tonight, yet again I was reminded why.

She met me after her class at 6 PM and I took her for dinner at Carlos & Pepe’s and then we went out to see Lake of Stew and The Irish Bastards. Folky bluegrass and Irish traditional hybrid respectively.  I’ve seen them both before, she had not. I was amazed at how, at 18 years old, she took to them like a fish to water. She was clapping and bopping and smiling. She is unendingly curious. How did they make that sound? How did they make that instrument? I love how musically inclined she is and how eager to try new things. I’m also so very very pleased that she likes spending time with me and feels like she can talk to me honestly and openly. She is such a wonderful little lady and every time we spent time together and get to know her better as the person she is when she int being ‘my sister’ am more excited about  learning more.

 

Flying Solo

I’m sitting alone in a vey busy, very hip local venue waiting for the opening band to strike and the headliners to come on.
The DJ has picked great tunes to ride the crowd from one set to another and the vibe across the room is great.

I thought I was being brave, admirable, feminist even. I thought  Iwould feel empowered and proud sitting here alone, but I don’t. I feel awkward and lonely and obvious.

I miss my ex-lover, I miss my friends in Toronto and I miss the time in my life when I didn’t wonder almost every day if it really and truly is possible to make new and interesting friends at ‘my age’.

This is clearly not a Happy Moment and I’m afraid that for the first time in 2011 I’ll have to go to bed without one. Unless you count my leaving the house and trying. My yoga teacher says that some days the beauty and the gift is simply in the act of coming to your mat. I hope that’s true, because if so, at least I can give myself points for ‘coming to the mat’.

The Power of Music (HM)

Just minutes ago I was gifted a song on iTunes by a dear friend several provinces away. We were on the phone earlier and both having crummy days involving, but not limited to, our love lives. Then, just now, as I was wondering what on earth I would use as my HM of the day, I got  notification that I was sent this song.

Not only is it a beautiful, poignant song, but the act itself, of what it says about him, and our friendship and of what I mean to him, just makes me all warm and squishy.

Dancing With Mah-seh-elf (HM)

(In case you didn’t catch it, you were to read the title with Billy Idol’s singing voice)

Tonight I went out on  date with a really super person; intelligent, beautiful, loyal, great smile… And the best part is I knew before even leaving the house that they’d come home with me and treat me just the way I like. Impossible you say? No m’am/sir!

The thing is I took myself out for the night. I put on a very cute matching bra & undies set (Betsey Johnson), did my hair, curled my lashes and glossed my lips. I poured myself a double before heading out the door and marched myself to the United Steel Workers of Montreal concert. I stood second row centre and danced my yogalicious tush off, clapped in time and had me a blast. I took a compliment about my perfume from the woman next to me, danced with a guy decked out in a suit and hat (so very dapper!) and chatted with a very tall Winnipeg man new to our fair city. And I only checked my phone a few times (between sets) because A) No matter how good I feel about myself its still daunting to be solo is a room full of mile-end hipsters and B) I was waiting on a text message .

All in all, tonight I felt empowered and happy and strong and walking home I couldn’t help but sing Ani DiFranco’s lyric “I came here alone and I’m gonna leave by myself”, grinning a the way.

 

New Music

Well, new to me anyway…

Recently jumped on to the Poni Hoax & Thunderheist bandwagons. Saw the first last night (and subsequently met the drummer – very kind) and am catching the second tonight. These 2 bands are openers for their respective headliners: Ladytron was neither A) as good as I had hoped or B) as good as the rest of the crowd seemed to think and tonight’s big act, Crystal Castle might prove to be, if MySpace is any indication less exciting then Thunderheist. I am, as always, ready to be convinced though 

Also caught Seun Kuti and Egypt 80 a few nights back. Great energy and if I could shake my ass the way that back-up singer did I’d never have to work an office job another day in my life. Without a hint of irony or exaggeration I say that that woman has a *gift*!

Off to market I go! Happy Saturday y’all!

Canada Day

Spent a great day walking around TO sampling the Canada Day celebrations with my friend T. The sun was shinning and the stars we aligned for goodness:

Great breakfast that I felt guilty for ordering (too much $ and too many carbs) ended up being free b/c they messed up my order…

Last minute Plants & Animals concert on the waterfront. AMAZING! Not only do they rock but they are from Mtl. Having been addicted to their album Parc Avenue, I was thrilled to catch them live in such a teeny venue. Also got in a game of scrabble, a yummy Indian dinner and good chats with friends lounging on the boardwalk by the water. No fireworks but hey – waddayagunnado?

Also, D called me. You haven’t heard about him yet. That’s because he has been notably absent from my life for over a year.  He fell of the face of my earth without a word and (foregoing all the lead-up to this) he called this evening. It bears saying that we were never lovers, never dated but we have, for many years, had (in my opinion anyhow) a very unique and, for lack of a more appropriate word, magnetic bond. We attended summer camp together for years, we partied together, we discussed art and the world together, hell- we were even roommates for a stint… All this to say we have some solid ground from which to rebound from but no matter, I still felt like I was talkibng to an ex. The conversation was stunted, halting, awkward. I felt like our words were made of the most delicate crystal, being held in the air by our tentative pauses and silences. I felt shy with him and scared. It made me sad and I hope we can move past it. I have missed him so much… I hope we can pick up where we left off…

And ikn other news Im getting my wisdom tooth pulled on Tuesday. Nooooooooooooooooooo!

Stats I Can Get Into

If stats had been this much fun when I did them for sociology I might have pulled higher then a C. Wicked funny. Enjoy!

 

WhiteRoom is makin’ music

WhiteRoom will be performing this Saturday Feb. 23rd at The Griffon Room at The Centre St-Ambroise. These guys are not only awesome musicians but also awesome people and really, what other reason do you need to go out and see ‘em?

Who?    http://www.whiteroom.ca
              http://www.myspace.com/officialwhiteroom

Where? 5080 St-Ambroise (corner St-Remi,, south of Notre Dame St W)

When?   9PM